Post by Avelon on May 13, 2005 7:42:21 GMT -5
Despite their many shortcomings, RPGs have been, until a few weeks ago, my favoured genre of console game.
If asked, I'd probably still say RPGs are my favoured genre for consoles, because console games these days (with a few exceptions) are a joke. At least the knowledge that people probably WILL have to run your game on minimum system requirements if you render 20,000 polygons to a model, 5,000 models to a scene forces most PC gaming companies to look elsewhere for gamers' money. You know, like 'fun'.
But since consoles are all exactly the same, and the games are specifically designed to match those specs, there's no such restriction on consoles.
But I digress.
My point (you see, I created this thread with a point in mind...that's something you could all learn from) is that consoles in general, and console RPGs in particular, are about as much fun as quaffing a pint of hydrochloric acid. Except less exciting.
...better type quickly...not much time left...
Here on the computer, we have games like Black & White, the immortal (no pun intended) God RPG, or the Elder Scrolls series.
On the console, we have an upcoming Kingdom Hearts sequel.
On the computer, we have emulation of oldschool games.
On the console, we have yet another remake of an old Final Fantasy game.
The last part, I can't complain too much about. The first remake of the first two games (Final Fantasy: Origins) was what the Portugese (or is it Koreans...? Poison's starting to take my memory) would call 'sucky-sucky'. I can't blame Square for having another go at it, now that they have the wisdom of Enix to draw on.
Square: Hmmm... We only used that Junction system once. We could bring it back...part of the whole, you know, soul thing.
Enix: No; the levelless skill system is being more widely used. That's what the people want right now - and the original had it. Why change it?
Square: Okay, then we could make Lionheart 'Leonhart' and watch the tributes pour in.
Enix: No... You're remaking the old game, and the concensus of these '95 emulation shrines is that Squall's name came from this character -- look, they even have similar hairstyles. It would be taken wrongly.
Square: Alright. Fine. How about we set up the swordsman with the archer girl? Bit of romance. See, halfway through the destruction of the Dreadn-
Enix: No, no, no. They're supposed to be children, and that isn't acceptable in the U.S.
Square: ... Then we're making axes suck.
Enix: Axes are larger and-
Square: SUCK.
That, in fact, is what made me snap. The third best sword in this game is more powerful than any other weapon of any other type, barring unique/ultimate weapons, whose stats were not listed (so I can't say with certainty they're weaker).
And no, there is no 'ultimate axe'. The most powerful axe equates to a bow you can get halfway through the game. A bow. Bows lower your attack power through most of the game, until you get the really strong ones.
Another thing... People always say the feel of the controller alone is worth playing a console game on its console, rather than emulating it. I can no longer stand the feel of a normal NES controller. i.e. my first console. Sure, I played Atari, but only after NES. I could play a Playstation, but the only Playstation games I own are Legend of Dragoon, Chrono Cross, and the various Final Fantasy releases for PSX. I prefer my USB controller, and for some things, I prefer the keyboard even to that.
Oh, but the clever debater might argue: "There are a lot of good non-RPG console games."
My counter-argument: "No there aren't. STFU."
There are a handful. Of the good non-RPG console games, you're looking at maybe 70-80 hours of playtime to beat them all back to back, barring those games which are actually impossible to beat and only say they have an ending to make you cry...like Adventures of Lolo.
And before Jest comes in, does a little reading, then even less thinking, I'll do the latter for him: No, Jest; although the NES has 7,000+ games and M.I.M.E. has 2,000+, my 70-80 hours of playtime statement remains true. 'Bad Dudes' has the best intro ever, but it's NOT A GOOD GAME. It's a sidescrolling kung fu game, which could be its own NES genre. Let me just be perfectly clear here:
Castlevania II: Simon's Quest is a good game.
P.O.W. is not a good game.
Ninja Gaiden is a good game.
A Boy And His Blob is not a good game.
Bomber Man is a good game.
Codename Viper is not a good game.
The Immortal is a good game.
Contra is not a good game.
Are you seeing a pattern here? Are you seeing things that are similar between the good games, and things that are similar between the bad games? You're right. I threw A Boy And His Blob in there to confuse you. Surely no game so rank and foul could be on the same level as these other 'bad games'. Well, you're right. But they all suck ass.
As for M.I.M.E.? Yeah, I'm eternally thankful for my recycle bin. Emulator, ROMs, and dignity. </story>
Back to what I was going on about...before this awful cold... Could someone close the door and shut that kid up?
Right. What I'm getting at is that consoles suck ass. I think I said that, but I can't remember. Oh, and consoles suck ass.
Then I was running down the hill, straight into the enemy camp.
But SHE didn't know about it.
So I kept up the affair for another month, skimming off the top of my paycheck for the abortion.
/me falls over and lies still.
If asked, I'd probably still say RPGs are my favoured genre for consoles, because console games these days (with a few exceptions) are a joke. At least the knowledge that people probably WILL have to run your game on minimum system requirements if you render 20,000 polygons to a model, 5,000 models to a scene forces most PC gaming companies to look elsewhere for gamers' money. You know, like 'fun'.
But since consoles are all exactly the same, and the games are specifically designed to match those specs, there's no such restriction on consoles.
But I digress.
My point (you see, I created this thread with a point in mind...that's something you could all learn from) is that consoles in general, and console RPGs in particular, are about as much fun as quaffing a pint of hydrochloric acid. Except less exciting.
...better type quickly...not much time left...
Here on the computer, we have games like Black & White, the immortal (no pun intended) God RPG, or the Elder Scrolls series.
On the console, we have an upcoming Kingdom Hearts sequel.
On the computer, we have emulation of oldschool games.
On the console, we have yet another remake of an old Final Fantasy game.
The last part, I can't complain too much about. The first remake of the first two games (Final Fantasy: Origins) was what the Portugese (or is it Koreans...? Poison's starting to take my memory) would call 'sucky-sucky'. I can't blame Square for having another go at it, now that they have the wisdom of Enix to draw on.
Square: Hmmm... We only used that Junction system once. We could bring it back...part of the whole, you know, soul thing.
Enix: No; the levelless skill system is being more widely used. That's what the people want right now - and the original had it. Why change it?
Square: Okay, then we could make Lionheart 'Leonhart' and watch the tributes pour in.
Enix: No... You're remaking the old game, and the concensus of these '95 emulation shrines is that Squall's name came from this character -- look, they even have similar hairstyles. It would be taken wrongly.
Square: Alright. Fine. How about we set up the swordsman with the archer girl? Bit of romance. See, halfway through the destruction of the Dreadn-
Enix: No, no, no. They're supposed to be children, and that isn't acceptable in the U.S.
Square: ... Then we're making axes suck.
Enix: Axes are larger and-
Square: SUCK.
That, in fact, is what made me snap. The third best sword in this game is more powerful than any other weapon of any other type, barring unique/ultimate weapons, whose stats were not listed (so I can't say with certainty they're weaker).
And no, there is no 'ultimate axe'. The most powerful axe equates to a bow you can get halfway through the game. A bow. Bows lower your attack power through most of the game, until you get the really strong ones.
Another thing... People always say the feel of the controller alone is worth playing a console game on its console, rather than emulating it. I can no longer stand the feel of a normal NES controller. i.e. my first console. Sure, I played Atari, but only after NES. I could play a Playstation, but the only Playstation games I own are Legend of Dragoon, Chrono Cross, and the various Final Fantasy releases for PSX. I prefer my USB controller, and for some things, I prefer the keyboard even to that.
Oh, but the clever debater might argue: "There are a lot of good non-RPG console games."
My counter-argument: "No there aren't. STFU."
There are a handful. Of the good non-RPG console games, you're looking at maybe 70-80 hours of playtime to beat them all back to back, barring those games which are actually impossible to beat and only say they have an ending to make you cry...like Adventures of Lolo.
And before Jest comes in, does a little reading, then even less thinking, I'll do the latter for him: No, Jest; although the NES has 7,000+ games and M.I.M.E. has 2,000+, my 70-80 hours of playtime statement remains true. 'Bad Dudes' has the best intro ever, but it's NOT A GOOD GAME. It's a sidescrolling kung fu game, which could be its own NES genre. Let me just be perfectly clear here:
Castlevania II: Simon's Quest is a good game.
P.O.W. is not a good game.
Ninja Gaiden is a good game.
A Boy And His Blob is not a good game.
Bomber Man is a good game.
Codename Viper is not a good game.
The Immortal is a good game.
Contra is not a good game.
Are you seeing a pattern here? Are you seeing things that are similar between the good games, and things that are similar between the bad games? You're right. I threw A Boy And His Blob in there to confuse you. Surely no game so rank and foul could be on the same level as these other 'bad games'. Well, you're right. But they all suck ass.
As for M.I.M.E.? Yeah, I'm eternally thankful for my recycle bin. Emulator, ROMs, and dignity. </story>
Back to what I was going on about...before this awful cold... Could someone close the door and shut that kid up?
Right. What I'm getting at is that consoles suck ass. I think I said that, but I can't remember. Oh, and consoles suck ass.
Then I was running down the hill, straight into the enemy camp.
But SHE didn't know about it.
So I kept up the affair for another month, skimming off the top of my paycheck for the abortion.
/me falls over and lies still.
